This is my life. This is what God taught me. Counseling from God’s Word

I met with the sweetest lady from the IMB today.  She was talking to some other students and let me join them.  She was talking about sin and being quiet.  She was talking about the different motives we have.  She said we can be quiet because we are afraid of what people are going to think of what we say and that is a sin and that we can speak out of pride and that is a sin as well.  I realized that I’ve probably done both haha.  When we feel like God wants us to approach someone or say something to them and we don’t because of fear or any other reason that is a sin! The good news though is that God provides grace and a new start! He is a gracious God willing and ready to forgive us when we ask and help us to start again!

Change is hard.  Sometimes you can think you’ve changed and then sometimes you fail and feel like you’ve ended up exactly where you’ve started.  I think that might have been kind of how Paul felt when he wrote this in Romans 7:15-20:  “ For what I am doing,  I do not understand; for I am not practicing  what I  would  like to  do , but I am doing the very thing I hate.   16  But if I do the very thing I do not want  to do , I agree with  the Law,  confessing  that the Law is good.   17  So now,  no longer am I the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me.   18  For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my  flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good  is  not. 19  For  the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want.   20  But if I am doing the very thing I do not want,  I am no long...

This song has been in my head lately and especially this morning.  I desire to be used to by God.  I desire to love God and others more than myself.  I want to be emptied of myself and my pride so that I will be able to serve God wherever He calls me.  I want to be able to interact with others in a way that brings glory to God and points others to Christ!  Let’s pray together that we would be emptied of self and filled with God and that our desire would be to truly be to used by God to serve God and others.  Thankful to run this race with you!

This week at the seminary I am going to they are having an International Church Planting Week.  Missionaries from Sub-Saharan Africa are going to be here during the week and talking to students about serving in different locations there. I was able to see a couple of my heroes in the faith for the first time in a while.  I had first felt called to go overseas to Africa was when I had heard the story and testimony of a young man named Jeremiah Johnson.  Dr. David Johnson was the interim pastor at my church in Arizona and he talked about his son Jeremiah Johnson who went overseas to Mozambique.  Listening to his life and and the struggles he had went through reminded me so much of my life and the struggles I had gone through.  It made me realize there would be no greater and better way to finish one's life then to do it by sharing the gospel with another person.  Jeremiah Johnson was killed on a motorcycle accident in Mozambique after he had been in a villa...

Today I was walking outside at Southwestern.  At first I just wanted to get some exercise and it felt good outside.  Then I remembered that I had wanted to look for Kaycee's brick.  Kaycee was my really good friend and she had sarcoma cancer and went to be with Jesus.  I can't really explain what Kaycee meant to me.  I miss her all the time.  I wish I had taken at least one picture with her but I guess I thought she would always be around.  Sometimes I feel like I probably wasn't as good of a friend to her as she was to me.  She was always encouraging me and teaching me truths from the Bible and how to live more like Jesus.  She would always speak truth into my life.  When we first started meeting together to study a book called The Heart of the problem she told me that when she first saw me God told her that we would be friends. January of 2017 I decided to go home to Arizona to take classes from Southwestern online.  At the time...

I talked to one of my mentors, Mary Kaye Wonner, one time about how I desired to be married.  She sent me this song.  I’ve been thinking about it a lot more lately.  To me, right now, at this point in my life it means while I’m single and while I’m waiting I will keep loving and serving God.  I will keep praying and asking God to send me a husband but I will also keep praying and asking to change and prepare me- to change me into a godly woman who could serve Him alongside my husband. But even if God would have me be single I desire to be content and to still love Him and praise Him and serve Him ...while i’m waiting.

“We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone.”  1 Thessalonians 5:14 I met with a friend tonight and we talked about what God had been teaching us and we started opening the Word and just studying together and hearing from God.  We ended by praying for each other.  It reminded me how important the church is and how we can encourage each other and how we can speak truth in love to each other, sharing truths from God’s word, and as iron sharpens iron we can help each other become more like Christ!  It’s amazing how God created us for fellowship and made us all exactly how He wanted us to be!  Let’s continue to run this race together and continue to encourage each other as we go along! Love y’all!

I don't really have an amazing story for what happened to me on 9/11.  It was pretty much a normal day for me.  I was a junior in high school and I remember being in school and hearing about the events that had happened.  But I think at the time I couldn't really completely understand all that had happened.  At the time I first heard about it I didn't realize how bad it was going to actually get until it actually happened. Afterwards though when I would listen to the stories and read the stories about what had happened it made me think about everything more.  I remember reading the book about a man named Todd who was in the plane that flew into the Pennsylvania field and his famous saying "Lets Roll."  I remember hearing about all the people that died and were injured.  I remember hearing about all the brave people that stood strong until the very end.  9/11 probably faced a lot of people with their eternal destiny and made them realize their ne...

On Sunday my pastor, Pastor Bob Pearle, was talking about how there are many decisions you have to make and how the different decisions can have different outcomes in your life.  His main point was that the most important decision you can make is to confess Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.  It made me start thinking about different decisions I’ve made in my life though.  It made me think of the different women God brought in my life advising me maybe not to make a certain decision because they could see patterns in my life.  Thinking about that could make me depressed maybe and think if only if I had made that decision this would have happened (whatever this is) or this wouldn’t have happened.  One of my greatest regrets is leaving Cana.  My friend told me she didn’t think I should but I did anyways.  Because of that I wasn’t able to really see Kaycee near the end of her life and I wasn’t able to be there for her.  I know she had people who w...

I was reading and thinking about a meme tonight that said, "sometimes I just need somebody to say I know it’s hard but here’s some chocolate and 6 million dollars".  While that’s cute and all it’s not true. Chocolate no matter how good it is and money no matter how much we sometimes think it will bring us happiness will never bring us true joy.  Chocolate will bring distraction/ temporary relief/happiness but will never truly satisfy.  Only Jesus can do that. Come to Me, all  [ a ] who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.   29  Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and  you will find rest for your souls .   30  For My yoke is  [ b ] easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30 Look to Christ and He will give you peace and joy and rest!  He is the only one who can.

When I tell people that I feel like God is calling me to go to Hawaii there responses are usually like everybody wants to go to Hawaii or Hawaii is beautiful or Hawaii is a good place to visit but I would never want to live there.  All of those things might be true though but although everybody might want to go to Hawaii not everybody might want to live there or be able to stay there.  Hawaii is beautiful and the most ideal vacation spot really but if you are not called by God to go there then you might not be able to last there.  If you are just going there seeking adventure and beauty then you might get caught up in the mundane or when it doesn’t meet your expectations you might grow weary and want to leave.  When the culture there doesn’t meet your expectations or things become challenging you might want to leave there. There are people that move there and because of culture shock or because they miss their family too much or for other reasons maybe they decide th...

I wrote a blog yesterday about how my friend got married yesterday and how it was clear that God brought them together.  I almost didn't go because it had been so long since I had seen her and I wasn't sure what it was like.  Being there I saw so many friends that I hadn't seen in so long and it brought back so many memories of E and how we first became friends.  I remembered when I first started going with her to Cana Baptist Church and how I was talking to her about joining Cana.  E sometimes said things that made me frustrated but I always knew that God was using her in my life to become more like Christ.  E always seemed to know when something was wrong with me.  When she saw something weird or vague I had posted on facebook she would call me up and ask if I wanted to get together so we could talk.  I think I almost took advantage of that kind of friendship, thinking it would always be there.  I remember when she had me in her house with K and...

I went to a friends wedding today.  It was a beautiful wedding that pointed to Christ and gave God all the glory!  When I get married that is what I want my wedding to be like! It was a worship service to God with the Word being preached and an invitation being given for people to confess and follow Christ!  E is one of the sweetest and most pure godly woman that I know.  She is self-sacrificing and always thinkigs of others and puts others before herself.  She has done so much for me and has always been there for me helping me and challenging me to be more like Christ.  I hope my life points to Christ the way she does. While the wedding was going on I was thinking about how I might end up single and why God would have be be so lonely and have so much pain sometimes.  Then immediately it was like God was like get over yourself and stop feeling sorry for yourself.  I remembered that God doesn’t have to give me anything.  He doesn’t promise t...